An employee at an education nonprofit, after nearly ten years of service, is contemplating resigning just before a critical event after being strung along for a promotion for 18 months. The situation has left her feeling betrayed and frustrated, as she has invested significant time and energy into the organization, only to be overlooked for a position she believed was promised to her.
The woman, who has worked her way through various roles in the nonprofit, initially joined the organization as a fellow, eventually becoming an academic advisor and currently serving in admissions and recruitment for the last three years. She deeply identifies with the mission and values of the organization, which focuses on supporting students in underserved communities.
A year and a half ago, she expressed interest in advancing her career, prompting her boss to encourage her to take on additional responsibilities. Her boss hinted at a potential opening for an assistant director role in the alumni department, claiming it would be “perfect” for her. Eager to prove her commitment, she took on extra projects, ran alumni meetings, and helped out wherever she could, all the while hearing reassurances that the role would become available soon.
However, the assistant director position never materialized. Instead, another opportunity opened in the operations department, which she applied for in hopes of demonstrating her ambition. Despite making it to the final rounds of interviews, she lost out to a candidate with more experience. While she accepted this as fair, the situation became complicated after a former peer from her program became an executive director in her city.
When the executive director’s assistant quit shortly after his arrival, her boss again encouraged her to pursue the opening. She met with the executive director, who confidently told her that the job was effectively hers once it was officially posted. After three interviews spread over several months, she received a debriefing meeting notification that left her devastated: the job would go to someone else.
The executive director and human resources cited a lack of experience as the reason for their decision, which left her feeling manipulated. For 18 months, she had been led to believe her hard work would pay off. Instead, she felt as though she had been used to fill gaps in staffing and kept waiting on promises that were ultimately broken. Her frustration turned to anger, prompting her to apply for new jobs elsewhere.
Recently, she received a job offer from a different organization. The timing, however, complicates her departure. The woman hired for the role she was vying for is set to go on maternity leave soon, leaving the executive director in a difficult position as a major orientation event approaches. She anticipates that both her boss and the executive director may ask her to cover some of the sessions planned for the new hire, which adds to her internal conflict about leaving.
While her feelings of betrayal urge her to resign in a way that inconveniences leadership, her compassion for the incoming fellows complicates her decision. She has spent time building relationships with many of the new fellows, who are preparing to relocate for a program that she once found transformative. With orientation just around the corner, she worries about the impact on these new participants if she abruptly leaves.
As she weighs her options, she grapples with questions of loyalty. Does she owe anything to a leadership team that has not honored their commitments? Or should she stick around out of respect for the mission and the people involved? One person who read her story emphasized that her well-being is paramount, saying, “You need to look out for yourself first. Your mental health matters more than their event.”
Another reader noted that the organization’s handling of her situation reflects poor leadership that may not change, suggesting that it might be time for her to move on while she still has a positive relationship with her colleagues, separate from the leadership.
The employee is still considering how to proceed. Will she give her standard notice to help with the transition, or will she express her anger by leaving immediately? The emotional burden of the decision lingers. She wants to ensure that her departure does not harm the fellows she cares about, even as she feels wronged by the leadership she trusted.
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