A woman in her mid-30s recently shared her harrowing story of being held captive by her mother for three years after attempting to assert her independence. The woman, who escaped in 2018, detailed her mother’s abusive tactics that were designed to keep her under control. “The more I think about it, the more absurd it seems,” she wrote in a post that has since gained significant attention online.
In her account, she explained that her mother had long entangled their finances, using them as a tool for manipulation. After she graduated from college, her mother’s abusive behavior intensified. She committed fraud to access the woman’s accounts and then threatened her: return home or face homelessness. The daughter did not want to go back but felt she had no choice. What awaited her at home was a far darker situation than she had imagined.
The woman described her mother’s methods of isolation. Upon returning home, she discovered the WiFi router was hidden, making it impossible to go online, and the phone was stashed away, cutting off her ability to call for help. Her mother even concealed the car keys and battery, preventing her from driving away. Living deep in the mountains meant that walking to the nearest town was not a feasible escape plan.
The isolation became unbearable. The woman recounted how her mother abused her cat, torturing the animal to control her further. She described instances where her mother would isolate the cat in a confined space and threaten to abandon it outdoors. This added another layer of intimidation, demonstrating that her mother could use any means to exert power over her.
Abuse took many forms, including physical and emotional torment. With no locks in the house, the woman had little means to protect herself. She sometimes barricaded her room door, but it was exhausting and ultimately the barriers were ineffective against her mother’s forceful intrusions. “I learned to sit with my back against the door,” she wrote, detailing the strain of always being on guard.
One day, she managed to find a phone and dial 911. However, her mother interrupted the call, threatening to lie to police that she was the one being hurt. Given their local community ties, she feared they wouldn’t believe her and hung up. During the three years that followed, she learned to mimic her mother’s expectations to earn small freedoms, but this was not a life—it was survival under duress.
Despite the grim situation, the woman became resourceful. She memorized the safe password where her mother kept critical information, such as credit codes and account passwords. During trips to town with her mother, she discreetly saved the little money she was allowed to use. One day, when her mother was distracted at Walmart, she seized the opportunity to buy a prepaid phone. This small act symbolized her first step toward independence.
With the prepaid phone, she opened a new bank account, even though she had nothing to deposit at the time. It was a step toward reclaiming her agency, even as her mother’s abuse continued. “If she didn’t like something, she’d lock everything down completely again,” the woman said, explaining the constant fear of losing control.
After finishing her second degree, her mother finally talked about “allowing” her to get an apartment. The woman played along, knowing this was her chance. She found a job and signed a lease while her mother shadowed her every move, making a show of unlocking her credit. “I was twenty-eight, and she was allowing me to move out,” she recalled with a mix of anger and disbelief.
On the day she moved out, she took only her clothes and her cat, leaving behind the rest of her belongings. Her mother insisted they were safer with her, a clear strategy to retain control. The moment her mother left her new apartment, the daughter felt an overwhelming sense of relief wash over her. It was the first time since her childhood that she could breathe without her mother’s oppressive presence.
Since her escape, the woman has struggled with her mental health, remaining housebound out of fear. Therapy has helped her process the trauma, revealing just how abnormal her mother’s behavior was. She is working through the layers of isolation and control that defined not just those three years but her entire upbringing.
The journey to recovery continues, with the woman still grappling with the impact of her mother’s actions. Her story resonates with many, highlighting the profound effects of emotional and physical abuse. As she navigates her newfound freedom, she remains uncertain about how to fully break free from her past.
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